Haters
Well lookie there! My first "I'm Back" post!
Today, I want to write about my weight loss journey. I backspaced right there from 'battle' to 'struggle' and back to 'journey'.
At first, it was a struggle. I started at 5'11" and weighed about 268 lbs. I struggled to keep up with the other people in my FIT classes. After all, I had never been in a gym in my life but I'm pretty determined. I couldn't do sprints or jumping jacks because I was afraid that people would judge me bouncing all over the place, plus, I couldn't breathe. I always thought to myself "who would be okay with seeing that and not smirk at least a little behind my back?" Almost all of the exercises that I did were modified and I very much limited myself, full knowing what I was capable of, solely for the purpose not having to expose my fellow classmates to the ugliness underneath my clothes.
When you're used to hearing people call you fat for so long, you start to believe it, no matter what the scale says. My own clues to my obesity were an immediate sweat - fresh out of the shower, asthma attacks while trying to tie my shoes and struggling to find any clothes that fit me right. I hated bra shopping and would often completely wear my bra out until the underwire snapped before I would even think about bra shopping. It often left me in a dressing room, alone and in tears. My arms would often go numb from my bra strap digging into my shoulders and my knees were giving in to early onset arthritis from trying to hold up the weight that I was carrying. I made fun of myself before anyone else had a chance to so it wouldn't hurt as much. My favorite was "I'm into fitness... fitness whole burger in my mouth!" Oh, I remember the way it made me feel! After two failed marriages, I felt completely unlovable!
My Herbalife FIT camps were a lifesaver. You see, obesity isn't just not being able to find clothes that fit, it's a mental instability as well. It took a long time to change my mindset and for a long time the words I kept hearing were "you got this Sherry", "don't quit on yourself", "finish strong", "I believe in you, believe in yourself". Those phrases and words have been detrimental to my journey and I often repeat them quietly to myself when I'm in a tough workout. The best thing I have ever told myself was "don't be a quitter, that's what you've been your whole life".
After class one day, a coach was speaking and I will never forget his words. "Once you stop caring about what you look like in the gym, you will start to see results". I took that and ran as fast as I could with it. I repeat it on days when I'm at the gym at five in the morning with my hair half up and no make up on. Sometimes my clothes don't match and I can't afford new tennis shoes at the moment but I DON'T CARE! I'm still showing up. You know why? Because I'm worth it.
I have gotten to a place in my life where I truly don't care what others think of my weight, in the gym or on the street. It has taken me a year and a half to get where I am and I had to completely revamp my mind structure. My life is completely changed because of this! It's not a hobby, it's a lifestyle! There isn't a judgmental thought that you could throw at me that I haven't already thrown at myself at one time or another.
Also, don't tell someone they are overdoing it when it comes to health and fitness. Just because I care about my body doesn't mean your negative opinion about it won't hurt just as much as if you were telling me I am still fat... or too skinny! There are plenty of people in my corner telling me I'm doing a great job. Believe me, there are people who obtain their motivation from the encouraging words of others. I happen to be one of them. Why do y'all think I choose classes with multiple women rather than one on one training? Because we lift each other up on the bad days and comfort each other when we feel like we're not succeeding. "You kicked ass today!" is all I need to hear some days.
Just show your support to someone going through a life change; especially when you see that they are all the happier for it. Show love, kindness and motivation. It really goes a long way.
Today, I want to write about my weight loss journey. I backspaced right there from 'battle' to 'struggle' and back to 'journey'.
At first, it was a struggle. I started at 5'11" and weighed about 268 lbs. I struggled to keep up with the other people in my FIT classes. After all, I had never been in a gym in my life but I'm pretty determined. I couldn't do sprints or jumping jacks because I was afraid that people would judge me bouncing all over the place, plus, I couldn't breathe. I always thought to myself "who would be okay with seeing that and not smirk at least a little behind my back?" Almost all of the exercises that I did were modified and I very much limited myself, full knowing what I was capable of, solely for the purpose not having to expose my fellow classmates to the ugliness underneath my clothes.
When you're used to hearing people call you fat for so long, you start to believe it, no matter what the scale says. My own clues to my obesity were an immediate sweat - fresh out of the shower, asthma attacks while trying to tie my shoes and struggling to find any clothes that fit me right. I hated bra shopping and would often completely wear my bra out until the underwire snapped before I would even think about bra shopping. It often left me in a dressing room, alone and in tears. My arms would often go numb from my bra strap digging into my shoulders and my knees were giving in to early onset arthritis from trying to hold up the weight that I was carrying. I made fun of myself before anyone else had a chance to so it wouldn't hurt as much. My favorite was "I'm into fitness... fitness whole burger in my mouth!" Oh, I remember the way it made me feel! After two failed marriages, I felt completely unlovable!My Herbalife FIT camps were a lifesaver. You see, obesity isn't just not being able to find clothes that fit, it's a mental instability as well. It took a long time to change my mindset and for a long time the words I kept hearing were "you got this Sherry", "don't quit on yourself", "finish strong", "I believe in you, believe in yourself". Those phrases and words have been detrimental to my journey and I often repeat them quietly to myself when I'm in a tough workout. The best thing I have ever told myself was "don't be a quitter, that's what you've been your whole life".
After class one day, a coach was speaking and I will never forget his words. "Once you stop caring about what you look like in the gym, you will start to see results". I took that and ran as fast as I could with it. I repeat it on days when I'm at the gym at five in the morning with my hair half up and no make up on. Sometimes my clothes don't match and I can't afford new tennis shoes at the moment but I DON'T CARE! I'm still showing up. You know why? Because I'm worth it.
I have gotten to a place in my life where I truly don't care what others think of my weight, in the gym or on the street. It has taken me a year and a half to get where I am and I had to completely revamp my mind structure. My life is completely changed because of this! It's not a hobby, it's a lifestyle! There isn't a judgmental thought that you could throw at me that I haven't already thrown at myself at one time or another.
Just show your support to someone going through a life change; especially when you see that they are all the happier for it. Show love, kindness and motivation. It really goes a long way.
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